Busta and the Gangsta Elves Steal Christmas

By admin | November 29, 2013

Will these capricious beings be successful in their attempt?

For Christmas Busta and the others elves organize and go totally gangsta. Like the Wall Street Banksters and the major retailers, Busta and company are lookin’ for their cut of the holiday action.

“Busta and the gangster elves decided they want a cut of Christmas. Never mind Santa says, Christmas has always been free,” and that he gives the presents away; the Gangsta Elves decide it is time to end this tradition.

“Busta says they have been working too long for free. They want a cut of all the action. Every time Santa is mentioned or the North Pole or Christmas or Rudolph or the reindeer they want a kickback or percentage. Every time a store sells a toy or mentions Christmas they want a percentage for themselves.

They are tired of living at the North Pole it is too cold. They want to live in Miami and live the good life. They’ll come back north to make presents at Christmas so long as they get a cut but other than that they will live where it is warm. In fact when they think about it why not live all year where it is warm and make the presents there. Better yet, if they were getting paid for it, they could afford to hire workers in Mexico or South America or something like so they wouldn’t have to make the presents themselves and they would have enough money left over to get rich and live the good life till Christmas.

But Santa will have none of it. The elves say fine; they can always find another fat guy in a suit, and who needs reindeer when you’ve got helicopters and jets. Santa needs them to build the toys, but they don’t need Santa.

What they need and what they want is a commission on every Christmas transaction. In fact they are going to patent and trademark Christmas and Santa so that no one else can use them. Santa says they can’t patent the tradition it has been around too long. The elves counter clicking has been around for a long time and Amazon still managed to patent that. As a matter of fact human beings have been around for a long time yet they are still patenting DNA, so they have been talking to a lawyer and are quite sure they can find a way to patent Christmas and Santa and reindeer and snowmen so that they can get paid and if people don’t like it then they can call it Xmas and Xanta and rain creatures and Icicles they really don’t care but if they are not going to pay then Christmas will be gone. And Santa you will be out of a job because how are you going to deliver toys if we don’t make them for you? You can’t afford to buy them or pay for them and who else can you find to do your slave labor? Mexicans are trying to get into the U.S. to get a good job but no one’s trying to get to the North Pole even if you would pay them and we all know you would not.”

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Rudolph Reindeer TV Special

By admin | November 26, 2013

Tonight on CBS Television Network, watch the animated classic RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER,Tuesday, November 26 (8:00-9:00 PM, ET/PT) .

Afterwards treat your children to another holiday classic. Here’s an excerpt from Santa’s Adventures:

“Santa Claus Battles Evil Santa

Evil Santa hates Santa Claus and Christmas. For years he has dressed like Santa and followed Santa around taking away the presents Santa has brought. Many a young boy and girl has woken up in tears when they saw Santa has not brought them anything, or even worse sometimes he took away what little they had got.

Santa knew about Evil Santa or at least he suspected his existence, but it was hard for Santa to be sure; for whenever he turned to look all he saw was a shadow, and he thought what could anyone do with all the toys and presents? For a long time all those toys really were a problem for Evil Santa. Where for Santa as the night passed his sleigh got lighter and lighter, for Evil Santa his sleigh got heavier and heavier as he took boys’ and girls’ presents away. What was worse the problem what to do with them after he was done?

For years it was a problem. In the early years Evil Santa just threw the toys away, threw them off a cliff or dropped them in the ocean but then he thought of an even better solution, he took them back to the store and asked for a refund. Some stores wanted a receipt. Sometimes he was able to get away with saying it was a gift but that was before he purchased the Super de Duper Copying Machine that would copy any bill in the world and create a receipt that would allow you to return whatever you wanted.”

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Santa Claus Versus Evil Santa

By admin | November 25, 2013

Santa is coming for Christmas. It’s likely he’ll be leaving a gift for you. Keep watch over the presents you receive because Evil Santa may soon be coming to take away the toys.

Your children will be filled with wonder. It’s the Number One Top Selling the story of how Evil Santa came to be; how Santa Claus devises his plan to stop Evil Santa and save Christmas.

This modern tale of classic conflict between good and evil has adventure, intrigue and lots of excitement for young and old alike. Santa’s Adventures!

 

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Santa’s Adventures

By admin | November 15, 2012

Santa’s Adventures are a series of delightful Christmas stories created by AUGUSTUS about Santa Claus. These stories are devised to entertain and bring joy, with a modern 21st Century perspective, for children and adults of all ages.

The story of Santa Versus Evil Santa describes how Evil Santa has for years been destroying the good work of Santa Claus by stealing all the presents and throwing them away. Evil Santa is even burning houses down. Santa Claus must find a way to stop him and save Christmas.

Evil Santa is stealing all the presents, and even burning houses down. Santa Claus must find a way to stop him and save Christmas.

You and your children will be thoroughly amazed as you read how Evil Santa came to be; how Santa Claus develops his plan to stop Evil Santa and save Christmas.

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